1/31/2009 01:51:00 PM

some words of wisdom from about LOVE

from the keyboards of misis_pb

I'd like to share some words blogged by a good online buddy of mine, Ibyang.

LOving someone is not supposed to be a task.  Its never tiring. So when one feels tired already of loving, then maybe that's already a signal to stop, listen and think. 

LOVE and TOXIC LOVE.  Toxic love is not bad, its just not healthy :-)


Here is a short list of the characteristics of Love vs. toxic love (compiled with the help of the work of Melody Beattie & Terence Gorski.)

1. Love - Development of self first priority. 
Toxic love - Obsession with relationship.

2. Love - Room to grow, expand; desire for other to grow. 

Toxic love - Security, comfort in sameness; intensity of need seen as proof of love (may really be fear, insecurity, loneliness)

3. Love - Separate interests; other friends; maintain other meaningful relationships. 
Toxic love - Total involvement; limited social life; neglect old friends, interests.

4. Love - Encouragement of each other's expanding; secure in own worth. 
Toxic love - Preoccupation with other's behavior; fear of other changing.

5. Love - Appropriate Trust (i.e. trusting partner to behave according to fundamental nature.) 
Toxic love - Jealousy; possessiveness; fear of competition; protects "supply."

6. Love - Compromise, negotiation or taking turns at leading. Problem solving together. 
Toxic love - Power plays for control; blaming; passive or aggressive manipulation.

7. Love - Embracing of each other's individuality. 
Toxic love - Trying to change other to own image.

8. Love - Relationship deals with all aspects of reality. 
Toxic love - Relationship is based on delusion and avoidance of the unpleasant.

9. Love - Self-care by both partners; emotional state not dependent on other's mood. 
Toxic love - Expectation that one partner will fix and rescue the other.

10. Love - Loving detachment (healthy concern about partner, while letting go.) 
Toxic love - Fusion (being obsessed with each other's problems and feelings.)

11. Love - Sex is free choice growing out of caring & friendship. 
Toxic love - Pressure around sex due to insecurity, fear & need for immediate gratification.

12. Love - Ability to enjoy being alone. 
Toxic love - Unable to endure separation; clinging.

13. Love - Cycle of comfort and contentment. 
Toxic love - Cycle of pain and despair.

More about love and toxic love here






1/23/2009 10:13:00 AM

How do you break free without breaking apart?

from the keyboards of misis_pb

Its never about having enough money.

The success of a family will depend on its members as individuals.


As my friend, Melan, would say. "Life is too short to be miserable, so why the frown.."
let's all be happy, or at least try tyo always look at the brighter side of things...

1/09/2009 11:48:00 AM

clutter up your wall

from the keyboards of misis_pb

What a cool way to display small tiny bits of clutters.. :-)   (source)


Beautiful. just plain beautiful... 

Maybe next christmas...  or next weekend.. :-)

1/06/2009 09:28:00 AM

photo wall

from the keyboards of misis_pb

Perfect concept.  I will do this very soon...

but this magnetic photo ropes is another thing.  Just not sutre if this is locally available.  I dont think so.. :-(  

photo source:

1/03/2009 10:28:00 AM

another cool art posting idea

from the keyboards of misis_pb


Im hoping i can find time to have some of the photos we took and have it printed so i can post it in the house.  The photo above is a cool idea to post it.  Got it from here

12/28/2008 07:22:00 AM

Wrappin' it up!

from the keyboards of misis_pb

As support to the stores for the holiday peak season, i helped out in the busiest section of the store last dec 22 and 23, the GIFTWRAPPING SECTION. 


Gift wrapping is one of my favorite activities during the holidays, but doing it for almost 9 hours straight, takes out the fun already and replaces it with disgust and painful leg muscles.

About.com takes gift wrapping to the next level and runs a task analysis on it. 

Photo from here.



12/08/2008 08:48:00 AM

Weekend bonding - our 3 P's this weekend

from the keyboards of misis_pb

Weekend projects:


1.  Palitaw
(for those who don't know this, click to find)
I was not able to take  a picture, but my dad ate almost half the batch! Plus take home pa. 

2.  Painting 
After uying the art materials (paints and sketch pads and brushes, etc) last October, We finally got the chance to do some painting! And It was too much fun that we finished all the 20 pages of the sketch pad and filled up almost a wall along our stairs.  Thanks to Julie for her share of fun of 3 and 1/2 art works.  May i will try to take a closer photo of each just to share with everybody.  I think we will do this again.  A very good de-stressing activity.  Its just nice to see your hands filled with paint after painting.  Ada started from basic houses and flowers, pero she started doing abstracts after 3-4 basics... 
















3.  Polvoron
Our Saturday night out in Pergola and Ruins in BF was spent buying Polvoron ingredients and some DVDs and PS games.  

But it was only last night, after dinner (around 9pm) when i got to work on Kyan's polvoron.  Yes its his because he requested for it.  And bugged me the whole day to do it.  So i did.  Finished by 10:30pm.  And here's the result.  It actually tastes good.  And i was so happy after.  Thanks to ada and manang for the assistance.  Ada helped in the molding and Manang did the wrapping.  Julie and Kyan did the eating, and Taal too!